Dramione
by CerenbusSnapeMalfoy
Summary: Draco and Hermione find themselves in an unexpectedly uncomfortable situation, one that requires patience and cooperation - two things they've never had for one another. In order to keep their lives from falling to chaos, they must learn to work together in ways they would never expect. This is unlike any other Dramione. Trust me.
1. Chapter 1

"Who am I? I feel so... strange. Something's wrong. I hear voices. No, just one voice. Or two? I think I hear two voices. One is my own, I think. The other is a bit foggy, but it's loud enough to disrupt my thoughts. It's becoming bothersome."

"I can hear you, you know," the other voice, disgruntled, muttered foggily.

"How can you possibly? I'm thinking. I'm not saying anything. Where are you? Who turned off the lights? My head hurts..."

"Your thoughts are so unstructured. Do you just think whatever pops into your head?" The other voice muttered unhappily, also groggy but voicing it much less. There were other voices, or thoughts, that belonged to each of the two, but they were quiet and only fleeting as the two grasped onto more structured thoughts. Only that which seemed most important was spoken loud enough to be heard by both.

"I dwell on whatever is at hand," the first voice replied, trying to move. "Ow... I can't feel the right side of my body." the voice whispered, feeling a bit out of sorts.

"I can't feel the left side of mine." the second voice murmured, trying desperately to make the left side of their body move.

"Try your right side, I'll try my left." The first voice didn't know why he was cooperating with the second, whom he felt was intrusive upon his thoughts, and in all rights shouldn't even be there. "But this is probably just a dream anyway."

"I don't think this is a dream. It feels too real." The second voice seemed as though she had heard the first's thoughts.

"Stop doing that!" The first voice cried.

"Doing what?" The second shouted back.

"Reading my thoughts, it's bloody rude." He redoubled his efforts in trying to move.

"I'm not doing it on purpose, I can just hear your thoughts, I'm sorry. Do I know you? Your voice is familiar." The female voice in the void of darkness suddenly questioned, pausing to try and place where she had heard the voice from before.

"I don' know... I'm still convinced this is a dream... I'm going to sleep. Maybe when I wake up... maybe..." the first voice became groggy once more and slowly began to fall asleep.

"No, no don't sleep, we need to figure out-"

But it was too late. The first voice had fallen asleep and plunged the both of them into what seemed like only a split second of slumber.

When they woke, they woke together, blinking tiredly and looking around blearily. The blinding headache was still roaring through their heads, and they could still only control one half of their bodies.

"Bl..." The male, fourteen year old Draco Malfoy, tried to say 'bloody hell' at the pain, but it came out as a strong slur as he found half of his lips were numb.

"Wh-" The female, fifteen year old Hermione Granger, flinched when her voice was slurred as well, and her thoughts bounced around so chaotically she couldn't grasp at any of them. Her head felt crowded.

The two began desperately trying to work their uncooperative bodies, and at the same moment, stopped messing with the numb side of their bodies and instead tried to see if they could get the other halves to work. In that moment, they both screamed in fright as they suddenly shot to their feet, stumbled forward and then hit the floor with a thud.

"Ow..." they said in unison, their voices the same droning pitch.

Confused, Draco and Hermione tried to turn their heads to look for the second voice, but it was nowhere to be seen, and each still had the overwhelming sense that someone else was controlling their bodies.

Groaning, they began to haltingly crawl along the floor until they reached the four-poster canopy bed that they had fallen off of a moment before, and shakily forced their limbs to work, or at least... the half of their bodies that were currently obeying them. Confused when they seemed to be standing upright rather than slumped sideways, they turned their heads and had a nasty shock.

For before them, int he mirror, stood the oddest thing either had ever seen. One person. Two pretty faces mashed together to make one lovely, porcelain face. One startlingly blue eye and one deep, honey brown. Blonde hair. Red tie. Green robes. Male clothing.

"What the hell?" They cried in unison, horrified as they saw their lips move in the mirror, mashed together in the middle to form one, beautiful, unique face. Stumbling, un-synchronized movements took them towards the mirror and they swayed unsteadily, not daring to break eye contact with the foreign figure in the mirror.

"Mal... Draco-?" Hermione asked, and Draco found his mouth moving along with hers, speaking his own name. Their combined voice was melodic, crisp, medium deep. Androgynous. As much so as their body and face.

Draco's shaky left hand raised to his side of the body, and then smoothed over the middle, where the nerve endings connected to his brain ended and he could no longer feel his fingers brush over his flesh. "Oh.. my god..." he choked, and Hermione found that she was speaking alongside him unwillingly. It seemed neither could speak without the other speaking along with them.

"How did this happen?" Hermione demanded.

"I-pfft, what?" Draco spluttered. _"You're_ the Ravenclaw wannabe, how the hell would _I_ know? The last thing I remember I was in my dorm-"

"I'm going to just stop you right there." Hermione forcefully interrupted, using power of will alone to take control of their single set of lips. To anyone who might happen to see, it looked as though a feminine male student was having an argument with himself in the mirror. It looked quite odd, but only half as odd as it felt. "I don't know how this happened."

Hermione tapped her fingers over the skin on her side of the face, scratching lightly and then taking the tip of her finger to the very middle of their forehead and running downward, trying to find where she stopped and he started. But it wasn't that simple. They weren't split directly down the middle. Hermione found that their forehead was mostly hers. She could feel it all the way over to Draco's temple, where she lost sensation and he gained it. Draco's hair was the only hair she could see on their head, and a quick, clumsy spin for the mirror confirmed that all of her bushy brown curls were gone.

She couldn't feel the back of their head at all, which meant it was Draco's head. She then let her hand run over their right shoulder, which she could feel, and the other which she could not, and their chest, which was flat, and to her, numb. Draco's chest. Her hand brushed over their stomach, which was hers.

"What are you-" Draco spluttered when her hand reached down to their crotch.

"Shh. Experimenting." She hushed him, slamming her fist against their crotch, which she already knew was Draco's.

Draco shrieked in pain and his knee buckled. Hermione yelped and went down with him. It was an odd feeling. She felt like she was falling on top of him, but it looked simply as though one single person had fallen over.

"Bloody hell-" he whimpered, his knee drawn to his chest, whimpering in pain.

"That answers that." Hermione grumbled, groaning and trying to stand up without his help, only to find that it was impossible. "Get up. We need to figure out what's going on." she growled at him.

"Damn you, filthy mud-"

"I'm not afraid to hit you again, Malfoy." she interrupted his whimpering, their expression going back and forth between her annoyance and his pain.

Draco flinched and shook their head rapidly, which told Hermione that he had main control of their neck.

"Well, perhaps some kind of potion or spell did this to us. What were you saying earlier? What's the last thing you remember? The last thing I remember is going to bed." she went to cross her arms and it gave her pause when her left arm didn't automatically fold with her right one.

Draco was using their left arm to prop them up off the floor, and he was forcing them to look around their surroundings. Hermione didn't have any control of their neck.

"Wait... I can see through both of our eyes." Hermione began slowly, blinking, and forcing Draco's eye to blink as well.

"So can I." Draco murmured, sitting upright and rubbing at his eye tiredly, and then curiously at hers. "I can feel that." he mumbled.

"I can feel yours too." she whispered. "So we both can see through and feel each others eyes, which means we're connected more closely in the head. Do each of us control a leg or what?"

Draco shrugged, drawing his knee to his chest and feeling up and down it. "I can feel my whole leg, and I can feel... a little bit of my right."

"Our." Hermione corrected sourly. "We're in the same body at the moment, nothing is strictly mine or yours. And I can feel both as well, but our left leg is a little numb to me."

Draco snorted at her correction, angrily going to cross his arms and realizing the same thing Hermione had only moments before. It was a strange feeling when the other half of your body didn't want to cooperate. "Well... to answer your question," he began, sighing heavily. "The last thing I remember was going down to my dorms, doing some homework, and then going to bed. That's it."

"You didn't do anything out of the ordinary yesterday?" Hermione asked immediately after, halfway feeling like she was talking to herself.

Draco shook their head, once again demonstrating that he could and she could not. "Not really. I sat at the same place breakfast, luncheon and dinner, sat in the same desks in all my classes, just went about a normal day..."

Hermione was silent for a moment, and in the silence, Draco could hear very distant echoes of her thoughts, but couldn't distinguish any of them.

"Stop that." She immediately snapped.

"Huh? Stop what?" He gave her a quizzical expression in the mirror, which they had taken to staring into, since they couldn't look at each other any other way, and conversing without looking at each other felt silly. They each felt as though they were talking to themselves whenever they stopped speaking, but their lips kept on moving as the other replied. It was a very... _uncanny_ sensation.

"I can feel you trying to read my thoughts. Don't do that." She replied defensively, her hand unconsciously running through their hair, which Draco could feel.

Annoyed at the touch, he jerked their head away from her hand and ran his hand through his hair in irritation, smoothing it down. "It was an accident. I didn't hear anything." He grumbled.

"Fine, fine." Hermione was silent for a moment, turning their eyes about the room, looking for anything that would spark inspiration.

"What are we looking for?" Draco asked, as he was forced to turn his eyes wherever she wanted to look, aiding her by swiveling their neck left and right, almost instinctively whenever she wanted to look the other way. It seemed as though each could outweigh the other's will if they had something more important that they needed to be in control for, and right now Draco couldn't regain control of either eye.

"Shh..." Hermione whispered, trying to think, but she could still hear echoes of Draco's thoughts, which were disrupting her own. "Think quieter, dammit!" She cried, massaging her temple in frustration.

Draco found he was able to keep his eye open even as she had hers closed. He sighed and looked around as well, wondering if anything could spark _his_ memory. "Well we're not getting anywhere by just sitting here arguing. We need to tell someone about this... the moment someone sees us anyway, they're going to know we're the product of something gone horribly wrong." he scowled at their reflection, and Hermione opened her eye, looking a bit pissed.

"Yeah, sure." she pushed her leg up underneath them and Draco did the same. With their combined efforts, they were up on their feet, standing unsteadily. "This... is so..."

"Bloody odd," Draco finished.

Hermione attempted to nod in agreement, and found that she couldn't, instead Draco did for her, without even trying. "Our brains are linked in certain ways." She realized. "Very loosely, otherwise we'd be in perfect sync." She turned them at the hips so she could look at their surroundings, which she did not recognize. "This... isn't Gryffindor tower."

Draco shook their head. "It's the Slytherin dorms." He told her, taking hold of the bedpost for support. "This is my bed." He took a step forward and Hermione automatically did the same, and they began walking, slowly, clumsily, around the room. Finding balance and coordination was difficult, and hey constantly had to be near a wall to keep from toppling over.

"This is such bollocks ." They chorused, then rolled their eyes in opposite directions at having said the same thing.

"Bloody hell, if this is freaking me out so much, imagine how the rest of the bloody school is going to react!" Draco cried, cringing when Hermione's leg hit the side of one of the beds, causing them to stumble, but he caught them with his leg.

"We need to go straight to Dumbledore." Hermione replied, already trying to head for the door.

"No, we should go to the hospital wing." Draco replied, and they walked unsteadily to the door, and then wobbled up the stairs, their hands firmly gripping the banisters so they wouldn't go tumbling back down.

"I'm sure Dumbledore will send us there, but we need to speak to him first." Hermione countered.

"It's too far, we'd never make it. The Hospital Wing is closer." Draco grumbled, not keen on wandering the castle to get to the old coot's office when the Hospital Wing was several floors closer. "We are hardly coordinated enough to walk from one side of a hall to the other without tripping, we'll never make it to Dumbledore's, and I'd rather the whole bloody school not see us like this."

Hermione scowled and braced them against the wall, stopping for a moment to decide. "Fine," she finally agreed. "But we'll get Madame Pomphrey to call for Professor Dumbledore right away."

"You know she will, even if we don't ask for it." Draco sighed heavily, realizing that halfway across the commonroom, they had somewhat gotten into a walking rhythm, and had yet to stumble since having made it up the stairs.

"There, see? Not that difficult." Hermione stated after they had stepped through the portrait.

"Well, fan-bloody-tastic, just make sure to mind your step on the moving staircases, I'd rather not plummet eleven stories due to your clumsiness." Draco muttered ungraciously.

Hermione was about to retort when she spotted something so quickly that Draco didn't have time to process what they were seeing before Hermione threw herself back into the closing portrait hole, and Draco had no choice but to stumble along, as her will currently overpowered his.

"Merlin's beard-" he grumbled, rubbing at his side of their head which had collided with the portrait door as they were lunging back inside. "What was that for Granger?"

"Ron and Harry." she whimpered, pushing the portrait open ever so slightly and peeking out. "What are they doing outside the Slytherin dorms?" They had evidently seen what they had thought was Draco spot them and dive headfirst back into the common room. They would definitely not go away now, they probably thought Draco was up to something.

"Wonderful. Just what we need." Draco pushed the portrait open further and Hermione protested weakly as they marched back out of the portrait, which quickly closed behind them, irritated for having been opened and closed too many times in a row.

Ron and Harry were still standing there, wondering what the hell they were looking at.

"Hello Harry." Hermione stated calmly, though Draco could hear and feel the turmoil in her thoughts. "Hello Ron." She dipped her head to the redhead who could only stare in shock.

"Hermione?" Ron and Harry eventually cried, shocked.

Hermione and Draco currently looked more like Draco than they did like Hermione. They had Draco's hair, and one of his eyes. But their features distinctly had Hermione in them. The two alone were very handsome people, but together they made an angel-faced little doll that neither Ron nor Harry could tear their gazes from.

"Bloody hell Hermione, what happened?" Ron finally spluttered, taking an uncertain step towards them.

Draco took a quick step back and Hermione stumbled to right them before they could fall back on what she had discovered was _her_ backside.

"We don't know." They replied, their thoughts connecting more rapidly than they could comprehend, and for a moment they were in perfect sync, speaking together with shared thoughts. "We woke up like this, we're on our way to the hospital wing. We seem to be sharing a body at the moment, certain thoughts, and parts of our brains are connected, however we seem to have retained our own separate consciousnesses. At the moment we seem to have a more collective conscience, because we can't decide who is Draco and who is Hermione... we are different but the same. This needs to be fixed quickly, because our consciousnesses could blend together too tightly to separate."

It was obvious the whole 'we' thing was freaking Ron and Harry out, and they both subconsciously stepped back. "You think?" Ron muttered sarcastically.

"Come on, Hermione, we'll walk with you." Harry offered.

Draco scowled. "I'm here too, don't forget. And we don't need a precious Potter escort." He noted that as soon as he and Hermione stopped synchronizing, or whatever they had been doing a moment before, they had lost their ability to walk normally, and were once again stumbling along awkwardly between Ron and Harry who couldn't stop staring.

"What's it feel like?" Harry asked, ignoring Draco's snappiness.

"Vile." They replied, in sync again. "We want to get out of this predicament as quickly as possible, so please no more questions, just help us get to the Hospital Wing. We want to avoid being seen."

Ron and Harry shared at glance that clearly told each other that this was freaking them both out equally.

"Alright..." Ron agreed uncertainly, and they began walking in silence, Draco and Hermione occasionally stumbling or nearly toppling over.

Ron focused on making sure no one saw them, and Harry made sure the two didn't fall backwards down the stairs as they were going up them.

"Are you sure you don't know how this could have happened...? Harry began, and one death glare from Hermione and Draco combined shut him the hell up. It was the most evil 'I'm-going-to-eat-your-soul-if-you-don't-shut-up' look Harry had ever witnessed, and he had grown up with some of the most vile people known to man. "Right... no questions... sorry." He murmured, ducking his head and allowing them to continue doggedly trying to climb the stairs.

"Bloody, no good for nothing, this is taking forever."

Ron and Harry couldn't quite make out who had said that, or if they both had, but they remained silent, for fear of Hermione and Draco's wrath coming down upon them.

It did indeed take a long, long time, but they eventually made it to the Hospital Wing, though a few students had seen them, and only one had known Draco and Hermione well enough to notice that it was the both of them and not just some random student. It had been Neville, and he was now confusedly following in the pack while Hermione and Draco, unamused and exhausted, plopped down on one of the examination tables while Harry ran off to fetch Madame Pomphrey from her office.

"Oh dear..." she began inspecting them, telling Neville to run and fetch Dumbledore, and told Ron to go and get Snape.

"I told you that she'd get Dumbledore for us." Draco snapped.

Hermione rolled their eyes, smiling sarcastically. "Right, you know everything."

"Supposedly, now I do, because I'm sharing a brain with little miss know-it-all..."

"That's enough you two." Madame Pomphrey laid a gentle hand on Draco's shoulder, and looked them in the eyes. "Now... blue is mister Malfoy, brown is miss Granger, correct?"

"Yes." They replied in sync.

"What parts of the body do each of you control?"

They began showing and explaining to her what they had discovered so far, and Harry watched, dumbfounded. Madame Pomphrey had them take their shirt off, showing an evenly proportioned torso, quite thin all around. It was like any normal young boy's chest, shoulders, arms and stomach, one would never know it was two people mashed together. It was almost as if each of their body parts had been perfectly scaled so that they would fit together like a human puzzle. Everything had met halfway. Draco had been 5' 9" before this and Hermione had been 5' 5". They were now 5' 7' and a half.

After hours of testing and research on Madame Pomphrey and Professer Snape's parts, they came to the conclusion, that they had no idea what had happened.

"This is the most peculiar thing I have ever seen. I have checked for spells or potions and I can't find any traces of them. This might be a curse of some kind." Madame Pomphrey told them seriously. "I don't know that I can separate you two."

They looked shocked and horrified. "No, you mean we're stuck like this?!" they cried.

"Until we can properly understand what made this happen, we can't safely undo it." Snape jumped in.

Dumbledore was silent through all this, and finally spoke. "You'll have to make do until we can figure out a way to solve this. In the meantime, you two will be considered one student, since in only one body, you can't possibly perform the schoolwork of two separate students. So come up with compromises for your normal schedules, and go about your daily lives."

"What? You expect us to just go about like nothing's happened? As one person? You bloody old imbecile-"

Hermione quickly interrupted Draco, slapping her hand over their lips as her will to make Draco shut up wasn't currently overpowering Draco's will to express his displeasure.

Dumbledore's eyes sparkled a little at that. "Yes, mister Malfoy. You can't be missing your classes. You are the two most intelligent students currently in Hogwarts. Consider what you can accomplish when of one mind, hmm?" his eyes sparkled just all that more, and Draco's eye narrowed in hatred for that damned twinkle.

"In the meantime... I don't believe that speaking to either of you separately will be an easy task. Which is why I christen you... Dramione." With another sparkle, and a bid good day, Dumbledore turned and happily walked away, leaving Hogwarts newest, smartest student dumbfounded at their "new name".

"Dramione?" They cried after him. "It'll never stick!"

 **AN: Oh, but it will. :)**

 **Inspiration for this story struck whilst messing around with Photoshop. I hope you like it. If you want to see what Dramione looks like, visit their character page on the Mighty Slytherins Wiki. (Link on page)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Draco and Hermione spent the night in the Hospital Wing, tossing and turning. They couldn't get comfortable, because Hermione wanted to sleep on their side, and Draco wanted to sleep on their back. They spent the night growling at each other to stop moving, snapped awake after finally falling asleep thanks to a very lucid dream that had snakes, lions, and a lot of bushy brown hair. They continuously complained that it was too hot with the sheet, and too cold without it.

Over all, they slept poorly, but in the morning were sent off to join their classes anyway, since in Dumbledore's words, 'wasting your time sitting here, not learning, is hardly productive. Perhaps this is a good chance for the two of you to better get to know and understand each other. This provides the opportunity for you two grow closer… in a less literal way.' And he had left them, with that same damn twinkle.

Harry, Ron and Neville had scarcely left their side since having learned what had happened, and the lot of them had no clue how to handle the situation. They wanted to talk to Hermione, who clearly wanted to talk to them as well, but Draco's desire to ignore them overpowered Hermione's desire to share her thoughts and concerns with them.

And so, they were in the library, earnestly researching what could possibly have happened to them. As it so happened, Draco was also the kind of person who turned to the library for answers. "I just don't understand." They muttered as one, flipping through page after page of unhelpful material on switching lives and such. "There must be eight million texts on switching bodies or switching lives, but merging bodies isn't in any of these." They said in frustration, and with a flick of their wand, which also happened to be a very unique combined version of each of their wands, they sent the books back to the shelves.

Harry and Ron had noticed that subtly, as the day went by, they had stopped saying 'we' but instead had begun saying 'I'. But not separately. They had altogether stopped talking to each other, as if they now conversed internally as their complex thoughts slowly became more structured and less separate. Harry took it to mean that the more time went by, the more fused the two became. "Hermione, what happens if you two can't separate? Will you eventually just become one person?" He asked timidly.

They turned to look at him, the one sharp blue eye and the one warm brown eye narrowed as if neither of them believed that could possibly happen. As much as it freaked Harry out when each side of their face conveyed a different emotion, he wished for it now. The more time that passed, the more in sync the two became. He didn't want them to be one person, he wanted Hermione back.

They shook their head, and crossed their arms, leaning against the table. "I don't think that's going to happen. Dumbledore will split me- us – apart before our physical DNA and magical fabric can become too tightly mingled."

"Well he'd better do it quick, because every moment it seems like you two are getting closer and closer!" Ron cried, terrified of losing Hermione to Draco. Worse yet… to _Dramione._

"Calm down." They rolled their eyes, turning back to the books and skimming over the titles. "Now quit being useless, help me find something helpful."

"Who's saying that? Hermione or Malfoy?" Ron asked skeptically. "Because if it's Malfoy I don't think I want to." He crossed his arms moodily.

Dramione glanced at him, scowling. "Oh for heavens' sake, quit being so bloody difficult. I- the both of us said it, now will you just help me?"

"Hermione, why are you no longer saying anything separately? It's like you're already turning into the same person." Harry asked worriedly, fiddling with one of the books Dramione had thrust into his grasp several hours ago when they'd entered the Library. So far, he'd only skimmed over it.

Dramione was silent for a moment as if thinking, or speaking to each other internally. "Because having a conversation with each other externally is ridiculous, and it's easier to combine our thoughts, we get things done more smoothly and look less foolish doing so. And when we do that we no longer feel like separate people, so we sometimes forget to say 'we', alright?" They gave him a deploring look. "We're still separate people, Harry, don't worry."

Harry hesitated, then nodded, looking unconvinced.

Dramione continued to stare at him for a moment, before turning their eyes back to the shelves, sighing heavily. "If only…" they murmured, reaching for one book, scowling and putting it back, before reaching for another. "If only there was someone else who this has happened to before…" Groaning, they slammed the book shut and tossed it across the room, causing several students to shriek and duck.

Shocked, Ron, Neville and Harry all stared at Dramione, who was panting and looking also a bit shocked. So shocked in fact, that they seemed deaf to Madame Pince's yowls for them to stop damaging school property.

Stuttering, Dramione began backing from the room, halfheartedly saying something about their combined tempers being a bit lethal, before turning and racing out of the library.

"Bloody hell," Ron whispered.

"We're losing her," Harry lamented softly, clutching the book more tightly to his chest. "I don't want to lose her…"

Meanwhile, Dramione was hurrying down the hall, frazzled. "What the hell just happened?" Hermione shouted at Draco, internally.

"That wasn't me, dammit! Have you ever known me to lob books at people's heads before?" He cried, disgruntled.

"No but-" Hermione choked on the thought, turning to look to their left, and then to their right, then chose a direction and continued down it until they found a window seat, plopping down unhappily and glaring out the window as they had an internal argument. "No, but your temper is more volatile than mine…"

"Need I remind you who punched who in the third year?" Draco snapped.

Hermione laughed at that, but her laugh was strained, as she was highly stressed. "I wouldn't think you would want to remind anyone of that, _Draco."_

"Look, all I'm saying is I wasn't the one who threw the book, and if you weren't either, then it was both of us or…"

"Or what?" Hermione challenged, and they crossed their arms, scowling even further.

"Or Potter's right, and we're turning into a third, separate person," he finished slowly. "When we get into a rhythm of sorts, I start feeling like I'm losing control… is it just that you have more control in those times, or are we both losing control to… to _Dramione?"_

Hermione choked again, and they shifted nervously outwardly, spotting rainclouds in the distance. "I-I don't know," she whispered. "I feel like that, too… when we get into sync."

Draco was silent, and his blue eye instantly clouded with worry. "Granger, what if we are stuck like this? Will we forever be two people in one body, or will we eventually become the same person?"

Hermione shook their head, helplessly shrugging their shoulders. "I have no idea." She said out loud, and they hugged their arms tighter.

"I have to take a piss," Draco suddenly thought, and their knees clenched. "Dammit, which bathroom do we use?"

"I'm _not_ going in the boy's loo," Hermione stated as they stood. "We can just use the abandoned girl's lavatory."

"Where Moaning Myrtle can watch and have a laugh? No thank you." Draco hissed as they headed down the hall slowly, no destination currently decided, other than some lavatory, somewhere, soon. "Besides, we're technically in a mostly male body, we should just use the boys lavatory."

"How do you know that we're in a male body?" Hermione growled, unconvinced.

"Because when you hit me earlier, it bloody fucking hurt!" Draco snarled. "For that reason alone, I should get to decide where we take a damn piss."

"That doesn't mean that we don't have female reproductive organs as well." Hermione ignored his reasoning. "There's no way to tell how we're lined up internally. We could have both."

"What's your point?" Draco muttered unhappily, noting that they were walking incredibly slowly, as they were hardly paying anything any mind externally.

"My point is that we aren't in a wholly male body. And I'm _not_ going into the boys' lavatory."

Draco rolled their eyes. "Fine, but can we please hurry?"

Sighing externally, Dramione began walking with more purposeful strides, heading for the girl's loo, not the abandoned one, since Hermione internally agreed that having Moaning Myrtle turn up suddenly to watch wasn't a very pleasant thought.

Ignoring the other girls in the lavatory, they headed for the nearest empty stall with a mighty scowl on their face that deterred anyone from stopping to say anything to them, though one girl did squeak that this was the girl's loo, before hurrying away.

"Don't look." Draco thought grumpily.

"You'll have to close your eye too, then," Hermione said condescendingly. "I can see through it as well."

Draco grumbled an unintelligible reply, uncomfortably trying to undo their belt with one hand.

"Do you need help-"

"No." Draco didn't want her hand going anywhere near his crotch again. He could still feel the pain from last time.

The silence was uncomfortable. Unbearably so. When Draco was finished, and they were washing their hands, they couldn't even look at themselves in the mirror. They had reached a new level of intimacy with one another that they hadn't wanted to go anywhere near, and they had silently agreed that they would never speak of this again.

The rest of the evening was spent avoiding any topics that might spark the memory of their first largely uncomfortable experience, attempting to do homework in the Gryffindor common room with everyone staring at them, and having a go at dinner, which was pretty much social suicide for the both of them. The Slytherins turned their noses up at them immediately, and the Gryffindors couldn't even bear to look at them. The Ravenclaws all stared and whispered.

So Dramione ate dinner with the Hufflepuffs that night. "And I thought nothing could get worse." Draco muttered as they slowly, grumpily ate. Since the both of them were right handed, it was Hermione's job to feed them.

"Hufflepuff is actually probably the best house," Hermione countered, turning to look at the table full of them. They had accepted Dramione without much disruption, and one or two even sat on either side of them, neither staring nor ignoring them completely. "They're so gentle, and accepting."

"Go hug a Hufflepuff," Draco muttered grumpily, his appetite completely non-existent, but Hermione was still eating. It was her stomach, after all, and her right hand.

"You should be nicer to them," Hermione stated, taking a sip of pumpkin juice and swallowing it before she continued even though she was thinking rather than speaking out loud. "They're currently the only ones not completely alienating you."

"Us," he corrected snappishly.

"I thought that word was off limits," Hermione replied easily, munching on their potato.

"It is."

"Only when it suits you, you mean." Hermione finished off the last bit of their food, and pushed the plate back a bit, watching as it vanished.

Sighing, Dramione put their elbows on the table, supporting their chin with Hermione's fist. Startled, they turned to acknowledge a Hufflepuff witch who sat to their right. "Yes?" Dramione asked uninterestedly.

"I love your eyes," the witch said shyly, blushing just a little.

Dramione flinched, unsure what to make of this. The girl obviously fancied them. They were just unsure if the witch knew who they were. "Thank you…" they said uncertainly, hiding their expression behind their cup of pumpkin juice, eyes roaming desperately around the great hall. Ron and Harry weren't even there. Where were they? Probably getting Harry ready for the Triwizard tournament without Hermione. A pang of hurt bolted through Hermione, so strongly that Draco felt it too, and they spilt their pumpkin juice, coughing.

"Are you okay?" The little witch quickly brandished a napkin, dabbing the juice off of Dramiones' face, making them uncomfortable.

"Y-yeah, thanks." They quickly took the napkin off her and finished the job, cleaning their mess and avoiding looking at the Hufflepuff who was watching them hopefully.

"My name's Leanne," the witch held out her left hand, which Draco begrudgingly shook. Their eyes turned around the room again, wishing everyone would hurry up and finish. They wanted to disappear with the crowd rather than make a scene with an early exit.

"Um… what's your name?" Leanne asked after a moment when they didn't offer it.

"Dramione," they replied immediately, realizing that she had no idea who either of them was. To her, they were a totally new, unique person. And a potential lover. The thought made them shudder.

"Your eyes are seriously brilliant. I love how they're different colors." Leanne smiled shyly, her gaze drifting back and forth between their eyes. She seemed to like Hermione's better.

"Yeah… thanks." Internally, Draco and Hermione were having an all-out feud on whether or not they should explain to her what was going on with them, so she didn't get her hopes up or anything.

"We should tell her! It's not fair to her to think she has a chance with us!" Hermione protested.

"But if we're stuck like this for a while, I'd like there to be _someone_ who will talk to us. She could be our only social contact until we're separated, and we don't know how long that could be," Draco fought back.

"What happened to you hating Hufflepuffs? Besides, she doesn't seem like your type. She's nice." Hermione snapped cruelly.

Draco forced a smile, nodding when Leanne was telling them about her cat. "I don't want to be stuck with only _you_ for company for Merlin knows how long." He continued to silently listen to Leanne as she talked, adding the occasional nod and smile. "And right now she's the only one bloody looking at us without cringing."

On the losing side, Hermione merely sat there, sulking while Draco pretended to be interested in what Leanne was saying. The rest of dinner went by slowly, painfully so, and when it was finally over, Dramione found themselves walking alongside Leanne as she headed for nowhere in particular. She seemed to just adore their company, and had already discussed with them a wide array of topics that they were only vaguely interested in.

"Right… well it was lovely meeting you," Dramione finally stated, relieved as they had walked all the way to the Hufflepuff dorms and could put an end to Leanne's endless chatter without hurting her feelings.

Leanne stopped midsentence, looking disappointed, but she smiled anyway, blushing a bit. "Thanks for walking me to my dorm." She stared longingly at Dramione, once again looking back and forth between their eyes, dreamily. Biting her lip and looking very uncertain, she jumped forward and pressed her lips firmly against Dramione's, startling the living hell out of the both of them, before she quickly turned and disappeared inside the Hufflepuff dorm.

Dramione's eyes were wide, and their stance unbalanced. "What… just…" Groaning a little, and still rather wide-eyed, they turned and stiffly walked away. This experience had been even more startling for Hermione, who had never been kissed before, least of all by a girl. It made them wonder to themselves as they slowly walked towards the Hospital Wing, what if they were stuck like this? How would it affect their love lives? Would they have multiple partners for each of them, or would they have to settle for just one? They would never be able to agree on a single mate. Were they destined to be forever alone? No one but each other's unwelcomed company?

Burdened with such thoughts, Hermione and Draco kept their minds firmly to themselves that night as they lay there, once again unable to sleep.

What were they going to do with themselves if this was irreversible? Would they always hate each other and live a pained joint existence? Would they eventually grow fond of each other? Would they lose all sense of self and become one mind and one person? The thoughts haunted them through the night, and in the morning, there was still no news on if this was reversible or not. Dumbledore had already done extensive searching himself, and had contacted many prestigious wizards who he had hoped would be able to offer some insight where he had none, but it was in vain.

"We were hoping to not have to inform your parents until after this matter had been resolved and a solution in the works… however it's already been twenty-four hours and still we have nothing more to tell you than… you are stuck like this, for the time being," Professor McGonagall was telling them that morning as they sat on the medical bed, Madame Pomphrey taking blood samples and doing DNA testing to see if their DNA was mixed as well, or if there was still separate DNA in each parts of their body.

"For how long, do you think?" Dramione asked worriedly, glancing to Harry and Ron to their right, and then to Blaize, Crabbe and Goyle to their left. Draco's friends hadn't learned about this until early this morning, and had come to see it for themselves. So far they hadn't spoken a word to Dramione, merely observed.

"That remains to be seen," Professor McGonagall murmured helplessly. "For the time being, unless your parents wish otherwise, you are to continue with your studies, as there is nothing preventing you from doing so, and so you don't fall behind on them. I will give you both separate marks on whatever you come up with… so long as you work together equally. There's no reason for you to have to do the work of two students while in this condition."

"Have you contacted them yet? Have they said anything?" Dramione asked worriedly, as both Hermione and Draco were worried about their parents' reactions.

"Proper measures have been taken to contact them, yes. We are currently waiting for their replies-" Even as McGonagall was saying this, Lucius Malfoy barged into the Hospital Wing, looking furious, and Narcissa followed closely behind, her expression far more worried.

"Shit," Dramione jumped off the table and instinctively hid behind professor McGonagall, who turned to face the pair, startled by their sudden appearance, but not surprised that they had shown up so soon.

"Where is my son? What's all this nonsense about him having been merged with that muggle-born Granger girl…" his ability to hold tongue was directly affected by the situation at hand, and those present to hear what he had to say. The fact that he hadn't said 'mudblood' was thanks to McGonagall, who surely wouldn't have taken kindly to that kind of language.

"Mister Malfoy, please calm down. Draco is right here, and he's fine-"

 _"_ _Fine?"_ Narcissa shrieked, spotting Dramione. "Oh, Merlin, no, he's not! He's surely not! Who did this to him?" She cried, rushing forward to take Dramione in her arms, weeping and making them increasingly uncomfortable.

Lucius' gaze could have burnt a hole through anything. "What happened? I demand that you reverse this at once!"

"Mister Malfoy, as I explained in the owl we sent you, we don't know how this happened, nor do we have any idea how to reverse it. We only informed you because we thought it necessary that you know. If you are going to behave irrationally, I'm going to have to ask you to leave." McGonagall's strong voice and the silence that followed rang through the air for a good long moment before Lucius collected himself enough to reply.

"He needs to come home with us. Right now," he said through clenched teeth.

Professor McGonagall shook her head firmly. "I'm afraid that isn't going to happen. Miss Granger's parents have not responded yet to our owl, we can't make any decisions until both families are in agreement over this."

"Impossible. I will never agree with _muggles_ over anything." Lucius snapped.

"Well then let's hope that you can all agree as _parents_ what is best for your children." McGonagall stared a hole through him, her gaze intense. "Draco and miss Granger will not be leaving Hogwarts until an agreement has been made. Am I clear?"

Lucius sneered at her, clenching his fists.

"Am I clear, mister Malfoy? Or need I say it again?" McGonagall pressed, tightening her hold on her wand, her eyes narrowed.

You could cut the tension with a knife, as Lucius jerkily nodded, steam practically coming from his ears. "Narcissa!" He snapped, jerking his head towards the door as he stiffly turned to leave.

Narcissa faltered, tightening her hold on Dramione. "I-I'm staying here, Lucius," she whispered.

Lucius stopped in his tracks, swiveled around, and stared.

Narcissa remained firm. "I think one of us ought to stay, and it's going to be me. Go home… I'll stay until this is resolved." She spoke softly, and didn't show any signs of backing down, though she didn't meet his hard gaze.

Looking seconds away from biting the head off of the next person who even looked at him, Lucius spun on his heel and left, slamming the hospital doors behind him and causing everyone in the room to flinch.

Narcissa gathered herself and turned to Dramione, holding either side of their face in her hands and looking into her son's eye. "Draco? Dragon? Are you there?" She whispered, tears springing to her eyes.

"I'm fine, mum," Draco whispered. Hermione let him speak on his own, knowing that this moment was for him and his mother.

"Oh, Dragon, we'll figure this out, all right? Don't worry about your father… he's just upset." She pressed her lips softly against their forehead, and only Hermione could feel it, as it was her forehead. But Narcissa didn't know that.

Dramione nodded, hugging the woman, and for a moment, Hermione felt a connection with her. She was a mother. And she loved her son. She wasn't the awful witch that she'd expected Draco would have for a mother. Now his father… he was exactly as Hermione had pictured him. But his mother was a pleasant surprise.

Dramione sighed, pulling free of Narcissa and climbing back onto the medical bed, staring dejectedly at the floor.

Narcissa's heart broke at her son's sadness. "What's the matter, Dragon? We'll find a way to change you back." She sat against the edge of the bed, stroking Draco's pale hair softly.

"Thank you," Dramione murmured, torn between calling her 'Mother' and 'Missus Malfoy', so they compromised and called her nothing at all.

"Draco? How much control do you have? Can you hear me at all?" She asked curiously, wondering if she was speaking to her son or the witch he was connected to.

"I can hear you, mother," Draco replied. "And we control about fifty/fifty. This is all so strange mum… I just want to be me again…" Hermione allowed Draco to take full control of their voice, so as to allow him to confide in his mother undisturbed. She wished that he would be so generous when she wanted to talk to Harry and Ron, but they were sworn enemies. She halfway understood his reluctance. She on the other hand, wasn't so cruel as to not allow him to speak to his own mother.

"Oh, it's all right Dragon," Narcissa purred, stroking his hair. "We'll figure this out, and we'll get you back to normal again soon. You say you have absolutely no idea how this could have happened…?" she looked slightly hopeful that he might know something, and she had heard wrong.

Draco shook their head. "Nothing at all. Nothing out of sorts happened, I just woke up, and we were fused together like this. I don't recall even speaking to Granger the day before, and we didn't see each other outside of usual, in class and such. We've been searching the Library for answers all day, and we've come up with absolutely nothing useful." Dramione dropped their head into their hands, filled with despair.

Narcissa's heart broke again, and she did her best to comfort them – Draco at the very least, but her gentle touch soothed Hermione a little as well.

Dramione's friends all watched in uncomfortable silence, and soon began to edge their way out of the hospital wing, sensing that they were no longer wanted.

"Hermione? We'll see you around, all right? We've got to get to class." Harry called.

Dramione raised their head, and Hermione waved to them, smiling just a bit. "All right, Potter," they frowned. "Sorry Potter," she said dejectedly. "Draco won't let us say your name." Their expression and tone of voice changed drastically. "Well of course, it's such a stupid name. Must you always be such a prick? Why yes, I rather enjoy it." By now they were scowling, and making everyone uncomfortable as they argued to each other from the same mouth. It was really, really unsettling to watch.

Harry chuckled uncomfortably, scratching the back of his head. "Erm, all right then, see you." He waved again and he and Ron left slowly.

Hermione watched them go, lamenting their absence from her life recently. "You awful, terrible prick! I let you speak to your friends and your mother, and you won't even let me say Potter's bloody name! Yes, well I daresay it just might strike me dead to have that awful name on my lips. So deal with it. Your lips? You mean our lips, you terrible prat! No, my lips. I refuse to acknowledge anything but. You're such a bloody prat! I can't believe I'm stuck in a body with a bigoted, evil, no good- well _you're_ a know-it-all mudblood, Gryffindor's princess-"

Narcissa and McGonagall were watching Dramione sitting there, scowling at empty space, and continuing to insult each other with gusto. Narcissa looked a moment away from tears, and McGonagall housed a wide array of expressions before she stepped forward and commanded that they stop acting so childish. "Like it or not, you two are stuck together until further options become available. Until then, you will have to pretend you like each other until you actually do."

"Like that will ever happen," Draco and Hermione chorused, and then scowled mightily. "I refuse to become of one mind with this bigoted bigot! Ever again, ever! What's the matter buck-teeth? Can't handle me? YOU BLOODY PRAT-"

"SILENCE!" McGonagall had-had enough. With a look that would bring grown men to their knees, she stalked towards Dramione until her nose was an inch away from theirs, looking them both dead in the eyes. "You two need to get to know one another better, because all you have to talk about at the moment is what you hate about each other in the confines of how little you actually know about each other. There will be no more arguing, or I'll see that you, being currently of the intelligence of two combined wizards of exceptional talent, will do the schoolwork of four of the same year. Do I make myself clear, mister Malfoy and Miss Granger?"

Dramione nodded rapidly, heart racing. "Yes Professor," they murmured, humbled.

"Good. Follow me." McGonagall turned on her heel and began marching away, and Dramione didn't dare disobey. They scrambled off the hospital bed and scurried after the fuming woman.

Narcissa, completely unsure what to do with herself, hurried to follow. She latched onto Draco's arm, wondering what McGonagall had in mind to help them. They seemed beyond help, to her. They hated each other. How did she hope to ever change that? After a good long walk, and stepping outside into the pouring rain, McGonagall stopped once they were out on the Quidditch pitch, and the others simply stood, confusion on their faces while they used a repelling charm to keep the rain from drenching them.

"Five laps. On foot. No magic. Go." McGonagall pointed to the edge of the pitch.

Dramione's jaw dropped. "You want us to-"

"Yes."

"But it's so far!" They cried.

"Then you'd better start moving if you want to make it to dinner." McGonagall folded her arms neatly over her chest, giving her chin another jerk in the direction she wanted them to go.

 _"Five?"_ They whined, their shoulders drooping.

McGonagall's face twitched. "I'll drop it to three if you'll quit whining and just do it."

Frustrated, Dramione uncast the repel charm, clenching their jaw angrily as the rain instantly soaked them from head to toe. They stomped their feet angrily against the soaked field, and began moving, storming down the pitch at an angry pace. McGonagall drew out her pocket watch, so as to time them.

Narcissa watched on worriedly as Dramione made slow progress along the edge of the pitch, ever so slowly fading into the haze. "What will this accomplish?" She asked over the downpour, fiddling with her wand as she continued to keep herself dry.

McGonagall gave the woman a disparaging look. "You'll see," she said cryptically before turning, casting a drying spell over the bleachers, and taking a seat to watch.

 **AN: McGonagall rocks! So what do you think so far? :D I hope you like it… I personally had so much fun writing this chapter.**

 **Do you think Draco and Hermione will be stuck like this forever? Will they learn to get along? Do you think that McGonagall will be able to help them get along? I'd give you a hug if you'd give me a review. :) Fair? :P**

 **As always, if you want to read more on the story and the characters, please visit the Mighty Slytherins Wiki. (Link on my profile) ALSO DRAMIONE NOW HAS A THEME SONG, YOU CAN LISTEN TO IT ON MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL OR ON THE DRAMIONE STORY PAGE ON THE MIGHTY SLYTHERINS WIKI (Links on my profile)**


	3. Chapter 3

**FRIENDLY REMINDER THAT I LOSE MOTIVATION TO WRITE WHEN I GET NO FEEDBACK. C'mon people this story has been on hiatus for six months, let me know SOMETHING.**

"I'm tired, I'm cold, I'm wet-"

"Everything you are, I am as well, Granger," Draco snapped.

"This is your bloody fault," Hermione fretted, shivering and drawing their robes tighter about them.

"Just three more laps," Draco groaned, glaring at McGonagall and Narcissa in the stands as they marched unhappily by. Their boots continuously got stuck in the mud, slowing their pace, and the hem of their robes dragged behind them in the soggy earth.

"I really don't see the point of this," Hermione grumbled, yanking their hood more firmly over their head. By now it hung so low that they could only see the ground by their feet, and they were so waterlogged that the hood hardly did anything at all but plaster Draco's flaxen hair to their skull.

"Do you think that I do? Stop bloody complaining, I agree that this is unfair!" Draco cried, cringing and bracing for impact when they slipped and nearly face-planted into the mud.

"You- mean we actually agree on something? Is this what Professor McGonagall is going for? Do you think?" Hermione panted, swinging her arm wildly to help them keep their balance when they slipped again.

"I don't know," Draco muttered, swiping angrily at the drizzle on their nose. "All I know is I want to go to sleep. Somewhere warm. Can we sleep in Gryffindor Tower tonight? It's going to be bloody freezing in the dungeons."

"You mean you'd actually sleep there? Surrounded by Gryffindors?" Hermione cried, dumbfounded.

"Yes, Granger, I'd sleep in a Cornish Pixie nest if I thought that it would keep me warm enough! About to freeze my arse off."

"It's _my_ arse, Malfoy." Hermione grumbled.

"Your point being?" he sounded utterly and completely revolted.

"I- I don't have a point," Hermione spluttered, sounding defensive. "Just that it's my arse, not yours. I-I just… I WANT THE REST OF MY BODY BACK!"

"That makes the two of us," Draco muttered, turning their head to look up at McGonagall in the stands as they trudged passed her again. They slowed to a stop, clasping their hands together in a begging motion.

With a flick of her wand to indicate that they keep going, McGonagall went back to reading, without a word.

Whimpering, Dramione turned and marched on, shivering and dripping wet.

"Bloody woman. Is she allowed to do this? Doesn't this count as corporal punishment, if we get ill?" Draco lamented.

"I don't know, maybe. She seems content to punish us in front of your mother, though, so I don't think she's worried about repercussions." They rubbed at each other's arms, trying to get each other warm, and they didn't even realize that they were doing so. It was just a natural movement, to try and get warm.

"What do you think your parents are going to do about this?" Hermione asked softly after a moment of silent walking.

"I… really don't know." Draco replied softly, casting his mother a quick glance, but the rain was coming down too hard, and they were far enough away that she could no longer be seen. "I hope they don't get involved. My father would find someone innocent to blame, and make an even bigger mess of it all."

"You'd actually admit that?" Hermione exclaimed softly, wishing she could read his expression, but settled for the gentle stream of thoughts that she picked up on. He was confused, but that was all she could gather from the jumbled mess.

Draco gritted his teeth. "This whole ordeal has done something to my brain. I'm ninety-nine percent sure that those words were somehow influenced by your thoughts."

Hermione shrugged their shoulders. "Fair enough."

They walked in silence for a moment, once again reaching McGonagall, and giving her their most desperate, pleading look, and this time she relented, not forcing them to finish their last lap. Delighted, and ready to get out of the soaking robes, Dramione hurried along behind them as they headed back to the castle, teeth chattering.

"Did you learn anything?" McGonagall asked as they got inside.

"I learned that the Quidditch Pitch is a lot bigger on foot," Draco grumbled.

"And that Draco would sleep in a Cornish Pixie nest if the option were available," Hermione added snidely, and giggled when Draco jerked and bumped her shoulder against a wall.

"I only meant if there was no other option!" Draco cried, noting his mother's bemused expression.

McGonagall seemed oddly pleased by their suddenly goodnatured quarreling, telling them to hurry off and get out of their wet clothes, casting a warming charm over them as they hurried past her.

"I want a hot bath," Hermione stated as they rushed up the Gryffindor steps, in decent sync, only tripping once on their water-logged robes.

"Fine, but only because I can't feel my foot," Draco agreed.

Hermione gave the Fat Lady the password, and they hurried inside, ignoring the looks they got from several Gryffindors who were quietly doing their homework in the common room. Once in Hermione's head girl's dorm, they slipped into the lavatory and practically ripped their robes off, drawing a hot bath and sinking into it contentedly, shivering for another three minutes before the heat made its way to their bones.

"That was a miserable experience," Hermione muttered after a long moment of silence.

"Agreed."

There was silence again, and after the water started cooling off, they reluctantly climbed out and dried off, avoiding looking at themself, not really wanting to know what their body looked like without any clothes.

"Granger, I'm not wearing your nightdress," Draco grumbled, shaking their head when she suggested it.

"Well I haven't got anything else." Hermione huffed, her hand holding the towel up around their body. It felt weird to her to not have their chest covered, even though it was Draco's.

"Borrow something from Potter or Weasley," Draco grumbled.

"You'd actually wear it?" Hermione asked skeptically.

"Over a dress, you better believe I would!"

"Fine. But we'll have to wear this until we get something from them." Hermione sounded smug, pulling her arm through one sleeve and yanking the hole over their head, much to his protest.

"Blimey," he cried, spotting them in the mirror.

"What's the matter, have you no confidence? Work with what you've got." Hermione smirked, brushing Draco's wet hair out before they left the lavatory, heading back out into the common room, Draco with a bit of a scowl.

Ron and Harry couldn't stop staring, and Dramione had to ask them twice to borrow their spare nightclothes, because Draco 'was too picky' to be seen in a dress.

"Oh… sure… I've got something you can wear I'm sure…" Harry replied vacantly when Hermione snapped at him for staring. He rushed off to his dorm, and Dramione was left alone with Ron's open-mouthed staring.

Dramione stared back for a moment. "Fishing for flies, Weasley?" Draco finally chided, reaching out and slapping him under his chin to close his mouth.

Ron shook himself, an involuntary shiver going down his spine. "It's not my fault… staring at this bloody monstrosity… well it's right revolting! And bloody weird! The sooner they find a cure the better."

Draco could feel every fibre of Hermione's being shattered inside them, and he had to fight to keep them rooted in place, Hermione's first instinct to flee in shame. Scowling, as the pain she felt, he felt too, Draco curled his hand into a fist, and slugged Ron sloppily upside his head, as he was not left-handed it wasn't a fantastic hit, but it was successful in knocking Ron against his wizard chess board and ruining the game he had been winning.

Feeling angry and hurt, Dramione turned and stormed off, snatching the clothes from Harry's helpless hands as he stood and watched.

"Ron! What did you say to them?!" Harry hissed, helping Ron up and watching Dramione slam the door to the head girl's room.

"I wasn't saying it to spite Hermione! I meant it about him!" Ron cried, clutching his throbbing jaw. "I said they were bloody awful to look at."

Harry grimaced, giving Ron a dark look. "You shouldn't have said anything, then. It was probably him that hit you." He stood and hurried off to knock helplessly on Hermione's door in vain hopes of mending what Ron had said.

Dramione heard the knocking, but, already wearing Harry's well-worn, but comfortable shirt and trousers, they were already curled up in bed, crying themself to sleep.

…

Dramione had little else to do the next day, a Saturday, but sulk in the head girl's dormroom, lonely, but not alone.

Hermione longed for Harry's assuredness and calm comfort, as well as Ron's currently absent acceptance and uplifting charm.

"I'm sure he meant it towards me," Draco said softly, not entirely sure why he was trying to make Hermione feel better. It was the heartache, he tried to convince himself. He could feel it bleeding from hers into his, and he could hardly stand it.

"I know," Hermione whispered, her voice cracking slightly. "But- but well he's a bloody prat and he says stupid things and I'm always letting him hurt me." She rested their chin on their knees, which they hugged to their chest and stared longingly out the window at the great lake.

"Well you said it there… he _is_ a stupid git and you shouldn't let him get to you," Draco grumbled.

"Easy enough for you to say!" Hermione cried, an inch away from crying again. "You're not the one who's fancied him since the first year!"

Draco shuddered. "I thought you had a thing for Potter." It didn't really matter, he just didn't know what else to say.

Hermione half-scoffed half-laughed at that, and was silent for a long moment. "Maybe a bit at first. I resisted falling for Ron, but I don't feel the same about Harry… he's more of a brother to me than anything. I fell for stupid old Ronald, pigheadedness and all." She wiped her eye fretfully.

Draco sighed, silent. He was about to say more when there was a gentle knock at the door.

"Come in," Dramione called, their voice thick with Hermione's emotions.

The door carefully opened, and Narcissa Malfoy cautiously stepped inside, feeling like an intruder.

"Mum," Draco said, relieved, and they stood and made their way over to her for a hug.

"How are you feeling, Dragon?" she asked, feeling of their forehead to make sure they didn't have a temperature.

"Just fine… considering the circumstances. Has there been a letter from my parents yet?" Hermione asked, and it took Missus Malfoy a moment to process the words.

"Oh, yes." She looked down at the letter in her hands. "Professor McGonagall asked me to give it to you." She smiled halfheartedly, and handed it over.

Hermione took it with a shaking hand, and Draco's gently stopped hers from tearing it open.

"Whatever they say, I'm sure their reaction will be better than my father's," he said softly.

Hermione was silent for a moment, then nodded and Dramione slowly opened the letter.

"I'll be in Dumbledore's office, if you need me." Missus Malfoy excused herself quietly, and Dramione hardly noticed, their eyes sweeping over Missus Granger's neat handwriting. Only Hermione noticed that it looked as though her mother's hand had been shaking when she had written it.

"Dear Mister Dumbledore," they began, reading aloud. "My husband and I thought perhaps we might have misread your letter at first, but having gone over it now ten times each we are forced to conclude that you either are taking the mickey or telling the truth. We do dearly hope that you have a sense of humour, albeit a very odd one, however if that is not the case, we do seek your wisdom in what we should do to help our daughter and her schoolmate. If there is nothing at all we can do, we would still like to come and visit her to try and figure some things out. Hopefully the parents of her schoolmate would be willing to come to an agreement on what we can or should do that would be best for the both of them at this time. With kind regards, Missus and Mister Granger."

Dramione was silent for a long moment, hardly able to breath.

Finally, Draco spoke. "Your parents are very level-headed."

Hermione choked out a laugh at that, hardly able to believe that they were as unconcerned as the letter portrayed them to be. It was written so formally. Perhaps they still were unsure if Dumbledore was pulling their legs or not?

"Well… I don't think they will be quite so calm when they see us like this," Hermione breathed, shakily folding the letter and tucking it into their trousers.

"Might I suggest pouring over a few books from the restricted section again? There has to be something there that references this condition in some way." Draco ran a hand fretfully through his hair, and Hermione had to agree.

Together, they headed for the Library.

Two hours and nowhere closer to finding an answer later, an exhausted Dramione trudged off to not have dinner, deciding they were far too tired for attempting to mend their shattered social life. Halfway back to Gryffindor tower, they ran into Leanne, who was just as excited to see them as she had been the day they met her.

"Hi Dramione! I haven't seen you all day!" She exclaimed, then suddenly looked both shy and embarrassed, remembering having kissed Dramione last time she had seen them. Dramione shared her awkwardness.

"So, I was wondering if you wanted to have a picnic with me? The rain made everything look so magical outside…" she looked out the window longingly, at the gentle light. "And we have just enough daylight left for it." She timidly took Hermione's hand, looking shy. "Please?"

There was once more an internal war on whether they should accommodate Leanne or not, and in the end they wound up carrying a picnic basket in one arm and holding Leanne's hand in the other, silently fuming at each other for letting the girl's sweet shyness convince them to not go and sleep until their brain re-solidified.

Once more they were silent as they ate, listening as Leanne chattered on about how pretty the sky was, how terrible she was at magic even though her family were purebloods, and how Dramione was the first friend she had made since starting Hogwarts three years ago.

Dramione had little to say when asked questions about themself, being rather vague about details, but sportingly answering random questions.

"What's your favourite colour?" Leanne asked, lying down on the picnic blanket, and encouraging Dramione to lie down with her.

"Green," Draco blurted before Hermione could say 'red'. They carefully laid down beside her, staring up at the slowly darkening sky.

"Mine's purple." Leanne giggled. "Favourite animal?"

"Ferret," Hermione said snidely, and knew that Draco was cringing internally, memories of _that_ transformation still fresh on his mind.

"I like chickens." Leanne smiled. "My family runs a farm. Let's see… gay or straight?" She grinned.

They were silent for a moment, both tempted to say gay in order to sway her feelings for them. "Straight," they finally mumbled.

"I'm bicurious," Leanne giggled, bumping shoulders with them. She sat up on her elbow, smiling over at the lake, then down at them softly. "Single or taken?"

Dramione was silent for a long moment. Leanne was pretty, there was no doubt about that. She had a dark head of curls, and big, dark blue eyes, rosy cheeks, a cute nose and a smattering of freckles, with various other appealing features. Draco had Pansy, who he didn't really like all too much. It was nice having her fawn over him all the time, but even so he didn't consider himself unavailable. Hermione had her heart set on Ron of course, but finding herself still upset with him, and a little bicurious herself at the moment, she was compelled to reply, "Single." and await with a thumping heart for Leanne's reply.

Leanne did not reply, at least not verbally. She softly leaned over, and tenderly kissed them, to which they initially did not know how to respond. Slowly, Draco's hand rested softly behind Leanne's head, and they kissed her back.

Dramione thought their heart might explode, the rate it was beating. They continued to kiss Leanne until she made a move to straddle them, and they quickly bailed from it, gasping a bit for air and rapidly explaining that they were late for something, somewhere. With a hasty, garbled apology, they rushed back to the castle, their head abuzz as they both freaked out internally, trying to process what had just happened and compare notes.

"So a love life in this form is possible!?" Hermione cried.

" _Love?"_ Draco spluttered. "Taking it a bit far a bit fast there, are we? It was just a kiss! A-and besides we only just met her a day or so ago!"

"I-I know…" Hermione fretted, and they paced the floor of her room. "I just can't stop thinking what if… what if we're stuck like this? I was worried that you and I would be doomed for each other for company and no one else or our whole lives. What if Leanne is our only chance for happiness in a life where we could have none from anyone else?"

Draco shuddered at that. "I-I don't want to think that far ahead, besides… besides we're still holding out hope that this _isn't_ permanent, right?"

They were silent for a long moment, still nervously pacing until finally they sat down on their bed. "We can't lead her on… not if there's still a chance we can be separated. It wouldn't be fair…"

"Unless we told her the circumstances. Let her know what she's in for and let her decide if she's willing to ride this out with us."

"But then what? Worst case scenario, we end up trapped like this, _and_ she's revolted by the idea of dating two people at once."

"What's the best case scenario then? We get separated, and then who gets Leanne?"

"I didn't know you were gay, Granger." Draco said in surprise.

Hermione was silent. "I'm… not… really. I'm a little curious, although I never really have been before. She's nice… and intelligent. And yes, very pretty. I don't know! If we're stuck like this for a while, and do end up dating her, who knows how I will feel about her after we're separated, _if_ we ever are, mind you!"

"I just think we should keep our options open… _but..._ right now really isn't a great time to be getting into a relationship, with our future so entirely uncertain. We should at least be thoughtful enough to wait until we know for sure if we're stuck like this… and then we'll decide what to do about our attraction to her." Draco responded, and they sighed and fell back on the bed, thoroughly exhausted from all the mental battles.

"Agreed," Hermione whispered.

"But we didn't determine if we're going to tell her or not?" Draco asked softly. "About our... predicament?"

"Perhaps… perhaps we could just say we're not ready for a relationship right now… but could be open to one in the future depending on what the future holds?"

"Sounds fine… I'm exhausted." Dramione curled up into a ball on the bed, worried over the details some more until they were thoroughly mentally exhausted, and fell soundly asleep.

 **AN: So I've been at a complete loss for the past six months on how to continue this bloody story. But thanks to Smeagsies, inspiration has struck hard. So massive shout out to them. :D**

 **AS PER USUAL, CHECK OUT THE MIGHTY SLYTHERINS WIKI FOR MORE DETAILS ABOUT MY STORIES.**


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